Why can't they make cars smell like bacon?

Original: July 28, 2005

Mood:Scared.
I want some food.

My owner just got a new car. It’s this big red one. I sniffed it, it smelled like food. I like this new car. He says all kinds of things, like it has a “graystone leather” interior, and that it has a “6-cylinder, 2.5 liter engine”, but I like it because it smells like food. Is it so much to ask for these auto makers to make their cars smell like food?

My owners are going on another darned trip again. That scares me. What’s going to happen if I run out of food? You know? It’s just scary.

The little plastic people are acting normal. I usually protect them from this little kid named “Josh” that’s always trying to kill them and me. Once, I even barked at this little kid. But, I’d rather it if they (the little plastic people) would give me some food from time to time.

I haven’t gotten my toenails trimmed recently, so they’re starting to catch on the shag carpeting. What’s a dog to do? You know?

Oh well. Just another day in Sissy’s life.